How to Help Your Child Manage Their Emotions

Dec 16

Reading Time: 3 min 36 sec

Teaching your kids how to manage their emotions; Photo: kid hugging mom from over her shoulders

Many teachers are asked the question: How do I help my child deal with their emotions?

One of the best things you can teach your child is how to manage their emotions. And just like any other skill, developing a strong sense of emotional intelligence requires practice and patience.

Here are four things you can do to help your kids manage their emotions:

1. Listen to what they have to say.
The best thing you can do when your child is feeling emotional is to listen. Make it known that you hear what they’re saying and are there to support them however they need.

2. Validate their feelings.
When your kid is feeling happiness, sadness, or even anger, let them know it’s okay. No matter how trivial the issue might seem, empathize with them and put yourself in their shoes, remembering their age and personality. Letting your children know it is alright to have strong feelings, even if uncomfortable, is essential.

3. Practice coping skills with your kids.
Teach your kids how to cope with stress and emotional situations by doing something that makes them happy — or at least takes their minds off the issue. Common coping mechanisms include deep breathing, counting, or busy work such as coloring or playing.

4. Parents should set a good example.
Your kids will always look to you to see how to act in certain situations. Therefore, you must strive to always lead by example and try to respond positively to stressful situations.

Teaching about emotion through reading children’s books.

Books offer a rich and engaging way to teach children about emotions because they:

Present Relatable Characters: Children's books often feature characters experiencing various emotions, helping kids see that feelings are normal.

Build Emotional Vocabulary: Books introduce emotional words, aiding kids in identifying and expressing their feelings.

Foster Empathy: Reading about characters' emotions teaches empathy, helping kids understand others' feelings.

Teach Emotional Regulation: Books show how characters handle emotions, offering examples of healthy coping strategies.

Photo: mom teaching and holding child's hands

Encourage Discussion: Reading together creates opportunities for caregivers and children to discuss emotions and improve communication.

Promote Diversity: Books feature diverse characters, teaching that emotions are universal.

Safe Exploration: Books let kids explore complex emotions in a safe environment.

Enhance Memory: Stories are memorable, providing reference points for children to understand emotions in real life.

Aid Cognitive Development: Reading books engages kids' imagination, language skills, and critical thinking, contributing to emotional understanding.

Develop Lifelong Skills: Books equip children with lifelong emotional intelligence skills for better mental health and relationships.

Reading books about emotion with your child offers a safe and accessible way for your child to explore, understand, and manage their own feelings while also promoting empathy and emotional intelligence.

Here are a few of our favorite children’s books that deal with emotions.

Books about feelings for 7-year-olds and up:

Book cover: Dragons on the Inside (and other big feelings)

Dragons on the Inside (And Other Big Feelings)
(2022) by Valerie Coulman (Author), Alexandra Colombo (Illustrator)
Helps children identify and cope with feelings they might experience internally, like anxiety and fear.

More than Words: So Many Ways to Say What We Mean
(2023) by Roz MacLean
Explore different forms of emotional expression and why forming connections is important.

My Feelings and Me
(2022) by Poppy O’Neil
(Another fantastic series)
This guide teaches mindfulness and mood regulation through fun and approachable activities.

Books about emotions for 3-year-olds and up:

The Color Monster: A Book About Emotions
(2021) by Anna Llenas
Teaching children about emotions like anger, sadness, happiness, and fear.

My Tiny Temper: A Book About Understanding Our Temper
(2021) by Christopher Fequiere
(Part of a 5-book series)
Teaching children how to cope with and accept anger and rage.

Breathe Like a Bear: 30 Mindful Moments for Kids to Feel Calm and Focused Anytime, Anywhere
(2017) by Kira Willey
(Part of a beautiful series)
This activity book teaches children how to be mindful and practice breathwork to calm themselves.

As always, check out a book first to see if it feels like the right fit for your child. Everyone is different, and you know your child best.

Ultimately, the best way you can help your kids grow emotionally and regulate their feelings is to spend time with them. By being present and stepping in to help when they need extra support, you will foster a strong relationship that prioritizes healthy emotions. This is critical because emotionally intelligent kids are more likely to stay in school, receive better grades, and develop healthy relationships.