There’s No “One Size Fits All” When It Comes to Kids’ Anxiety

Sep 21

Reading Time: 2 min

Title: Easing kids' anxiety; Photo: kid wearing backpack waiting for school bus

Many children experience back-to-school anxiety. Whether it’s self-imposed pressure to excel in a certain subject, social anxieties, or a fear of being teased, anxiety doesn’t have to derail your child’s love of learning.

Showing your child how to navigate through their nervousness can be like following a treasure map. The journey can be hard, and pirates might try to steal our children’s (and our!) progress. At the end of the journey, however, you and your child will feel rewarded with the riches of resilience!

Here are some tips that can help your child deal with anxiety:

Keep an open line of communication with your child
If your child expresses a fear or emotion, show them it’s safe to vocalize it. Keep your own reactions to a minimum and be cognizant of your body language and facial expressions.

Use routines to quell uncertainty
Many children experience anxiety when their routine is disrupted. As parents, however, we have a lot of control over keeping our children in sync with routine. Control what you can – like bedtimes, mealtimes and bath times – and the disruptions you can’t control won’t matter as much.

Get to know your child’s teacher and school
Keep an open line of communication with your child’s teacher, and make yourself aware of school policies when it comes to pick up, drop off, bus times, and expectations. You’ll better understand the context of anything they tell you about their school day. You’ll also be able to better advise them.

Title: Easing kids' anxiety; Photo: teacher and young children sitting on floor in a classroom discussion

Approach anxiety like you’re training for a marathon
It can be hard on a parent’s heart to send an anxious child to school when they want to come home. While you may think you’re sending a message of love and acceptance by allowing your child to avoid certain activities, be careful not to also imply: “I don’t believe you can do it, either.”

When it comes to marathons, a runner needs to train. The same can be said about a nervous child successfully getting through their school week. Help children train for better days by encouraging them to push through just a little bit more than they’re comfortable. Remind your child of their growth afterward by telling them, “I knew you could do it!”

Keep yourself in check
Children look to their parents as examples. Be aware of how you react to challenges. A parent with a can-do attitude often raises a child with the same.

Discover coping mechanisms together
Encourage your child to identify their triggers and accompanying body sensations. Maybe there is a way to prevent the trigger. If not, is there a way to make the trigger feel less powerful? Through trial, and error, and open dialogue, you’ll soon discover coping mechanisms uniquely suited for your child.

Remember, there is no “one size fits all” when it comes to dealing with anxiety. There may be days when it feels insurmountable. Challenging anxiety, however, can also be an opportunity for growth and empowerment.

Celebrate the small successes, and keep practicing resilience. Stay on top of it and before you know it, your child’s success will look like everything you’ve always known it could be!